There is never too much advertising. Last time we talked about print ads for video games that could be found in magazines and brochures. This time we will remember the videos that were played on TV. However, due to their huge number, we will first devote time specifically to advertising consoles.
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Don’t underestimate the PlayStation craziness
The PlayStation family can rightfully be called the most popular consoles in the world. The PS2, for example, is still the # 1 best-selling gaming device in history. It even becomes interesting how much better Sony’s performance would have been if the company hadn’t tried so hard to scare customers away.
Remember the promo videos before the launch of the PlayStation 5 – a bunch of expensive graphics with incomprehensible slogans? They, of course, were beautiful, but somehow sterile and therefore not memorable. Another thing is advertising of the first generations, which I would like to forget, but will not work.
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A television commercial called Mental Wealth was released in 1999 and ironically broke the psyche of more than one viewer. The video itself was nothing special – just a monologue of a teenage girl without much staging. And because of her strong Scottish accent, it’s hard to even know what she’s talking about – at least not about the PlayStation. I remember the video for its graphics – the actress’s face was made as if it were alien. The effects were so new and high quality that many people believed that the girl really looked like that. It took material in the newspaper to reassure the audience.
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The 2006 Baby video is a real breakthrough in Sony’s promotional thought. No, not because the company’s videos have become sane – this is still a long way off. It’s just that we finally saw a PlayStation ad that focused on the PlayStation. Not attempt to kill Bambi, not shark feeding by fishermen and not even cannibalism… True, there was also a very creepy doll in the spotlight, but progress is still evident.
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If you haven’t understood yet, the main killer feature of Atari Jaguar was its “64-bit”. The popular Sega Mega Drive at the time had a 16-bit system, and 32-bit consoles like the Sega Saturn and Panasonic’s 3DO were just starting to hit the market. “The world’s only 64-bit console” really grabbed attention, even without the teacher shouting. Unfortunately, this was mostly a marketing gimmick.
In 1995, Atari decided to lower the Jaguar’s retail price from $ 250 to $ 150 in order to somehow compete with the Sega Saturn and PlayStation. In honor of this, the company has released a series of informational videos. Technically, these videos were supposed to reveal the potential of the console, but in most cases they showed how the girl depicting Atari harassing a buyer. Because of this, the phrase “Pay $ 150 to play it” has taken on a slightly illegal connotation (at least in 49 states of America). However, sometimes they were more innocuous videos with the message “Girls only sleep with those who have an Atari Jaguar.” Fortunately, this is not true, otherwise humanity would have already died out.
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The video titled “Life is Short” begins with a woman giving birth shooting her baby out the window … Similar tricks can only be seen in very specific strip clubs. But that’s not all. After breaking the glass, the child continues to fly, gradually matures and lands right in the grave. Hmm, I wonder why this ad was banned from showing on TV?
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To be fair, not all Xbox ads were about death and the frailty of being. There was also a completely innocent, albeit weird, Funbox video. In it, a mother buys a collection of Xbox games for her children. The wildest thing about it (besides the insane laughter of the actors) – and they managed to ban it. It turns out that you cannot advertise what is not. Games from advertising existed, but nobody sold them in Funbox sets.
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There were exactly three directions in advertising from the 1990s: a creepy space-futuristic trip, an allegedly funny rapper skateboarding and random delirium that you can dream about if you eat a kilogram of marmalade at night. In one of the series of commercials for the launch of SEGA Saturn, in some incredible way, all three were intertwined.
First, we are shown a bald woman with rings around her head, then some gray and also bald man, and then – a funny guy who probably personally knows every dog in the local drug control. And this transition is so abrupt and unconditional, as if someone just switched the channel.
After that, the rest of the video sequence seems to be quite normal. A bearded man in a ballet tutu? All OK. Is the woman whispering the names of the games? Why not. The sphincter is barely holding back the wave of joy? Well, of course! This SEGA Saturn is probably the only console in the world advertised by a half-naked man, not a woman.
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The golden tradition of console advertising is running into competitors. This was the case with Neo-Geo and 3dfx from the past articles, and with the Atari Jaguar from this one. The same thing happened with the Game Gear. SEGA has released a series of videos in which they talked about the advantages of its new product – portability and color screen. All would be fine if she did not mock the owners of the Game Boy, comparing them to drinking from a toilet bowl and idiots beating themselves in the head.
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If you google the phrase “Weird video game TV commercials”, you will 100% stumble upon a creepy screenshot from the next video. In it, various Nintendo game characters declare that you cannot defeat them. They were supposed to provoke buyers, challenge them. In fact, they scared the hell out of everyone. It’s actually the Pixels movie – not so terrifying and destructive of childhood memories, but very close to it.
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Begging for a new toy is one of the most pressing problems of every child. There are a great many approaches to its solution. You can study hard, find a part-time job, save up the change forgotten by your parents, etc. And if none of the classic methods work, try Nintendo’s advice: Catch your dad dressing up as a woman. Just hurry up, progress does not stand still – soon this trick will no longer work.
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It was an advertisement for game consoles from the past, and not always very distant. Do you have anything to share? Remember the video about the PlayStation 3, which the whole country was offended? Or that video of an evil black guy yelling at you to buy a SEGA CD? Suggest your favorite videos in the comments. And if you haven’t read that this article is about consoles, share with us the video game ad.
